Adventures in lawn care-Just one more

And so I did it again. As my long suffering wife will readily admit, and she will tell almost anyone this, Mr. Home Handyman I am not. She also is ok with letting people know that I am not a fast learner. In fact it seems I don’t really learn at all.
Last year in one of my early spring adventures in lawn care I got the Big Lawn tractor stuck. It was a muddy place and I buried it up to axles and got a small tree caught between the back wheel and the mowing deck. It was a two hour project to get the Big Lawn tractor out that time and we were sure I could never be so stupid again.
As usual we underestimated my stupid capacity.
Different place in the yard. No tree this time but the lawn tractor was acting like a pig in mud wallow.
This time we are not so lucky.
It is still there as I write this on Memorial Day. It’s been sinking further and further into the mud since Saturday. I really don’t know how we will get it out this time. I have tried shoveling a path for it but because it’s sideways on a steep hillside it’s not really working.
Boards of all sorts of type’s, sizes and descriptions have been pushed under the rear tires in an effort to gain traction but no joy. I have completely disassembled the grass catcher to give better access to pushing but that didn’t help and now the area around the mower looks like a yard sale with parts and shovels and boards scattered around the poor stuck beast. If it was a horse we might have shot it by now.
Suggested removal methods have included towing it out with a car or another mower. I don’t have another mower (why would I?) and you can’t get a car or truck into the area where I made my latest mistake. At a flea market yesterday at the Circle drive in (where I saw a plastic potted plant that looked like it was dead. You could have bought this “furn” spelled f u r n plant for nine bucks. ) I looked at a hand powered winch, the kind my Dad would have called a come a long. I could clearly see myself attaching it to the mower, ratcheting the mechanism a few times and then deftly pulling the back end off the mower.
Like I said, Mr. home handyman I am not. Even in my dreams.
Later on today my long suffering wife tells me we will get the Big Lawn Tractor out of its muddy prison.
I hope she is right but I have my doubts. And I know the next step if we fail is to enlist the aid of my brother in law.
I can hear him laughing already.
Or then again I could be wrong.