A random look at the life and times of Jim Rising recovering radio addict and newspaper columnist.

Thursday, March 20, 2008


It’s not Jennifer Aniston’s fault. I am sure she just took the check and ran. But when I see something this stupid I can’t help myself. I just have to point out the lie(s).
You may have seen the ad campaign for “Smartwater.” I have no problem with someone marketing water in a new and unique way. Anything that can get people to drink more water is a good thing. You don’t need anything BUT water from the tap but if a little bit of this and little bit of that will get you to drink half your body weight in ounces daily, go for it! By the way, if you buy a lot of bottled water here’s a tip that will save you beau coups bucks. If you don’t like the taste of your tap water because it stinks of chlorine try this. Pour a big glass of it and let it stand for 20 minutes of so. The chlorine (and the chlorine taste) will be gone.
But the ad copy for this Smartwater is just outrageous. The copy for the ad that has the picture of Jen showing off her bosom’s reads: “What do you drink for taste? Not the swimming pool stuff. Or the tap. Or even the stuff from the ground. This water is pristine. Was never swum in or fell through the sky near the airport. It tastes the way Mother Nature intended. Clean. How smart is that?”
How smart is that? Not very. I don’t remember much about grade school science class. I wouldn’t know the periodic table if I fell over it. But I do remember that water on earth is a closed system. It never goes away, never! It’s ALL recycled, all the time.
The Smartwater web site makes some claim about “vapor distilled” pure as the first drop of rain. Hogwash. And I mean that quite literally. The water in the bottle of Smartwater that Jennifer holds in the ads probably, no definitely has washed a hog or two in it’s time. Probably been run through a hog’s kidneys once or twice along with spending some time in somebody’s cess pool. If it freaks you out to think about this then just remember this tasty little fact: urine is sterile when it leaves your body. In many third world nations where the water supply is pretty bad you may be better off drinking your own piss. Or Jennifer’s.
Maybe this is all just an excuse to post the great shots of Jennifer. In the one where she is wearing a bathing suit I saw a post on some web site that made the claim she was not wearing anything underneath.
I can’t see. Maybe I need more “Smartwater.”

1 comment:

Jim Rising said...

we have a cat. his name is rusty. rusty used to open the door to the bathroom when we were in there to get us to turn the bathroom sink tap on for him so that he could get a drink. i guess he thought it was better than what was in his bowl. after awhile, that's all he would drink... and so we were always having to turn the tap on for him, and then would leave and forget to turn it off... running our water bill up. who's got who trained? yeah... right.

so... we finally decided to go out and get one of these:


it cost us about $60. it has a $8 filter that has to be replaced every couple of months.

well... our little puffball didn't seem to know what to do with it, and just continued to beg us to turn on the tap for him! we stood strong... and would not give in. we were just about to give up when after about a week, he finally started to play with the stupid thing. then the next day he figured out how to drink from it, and since then has not bothered us for a drink from the tap.

pictures of the 'manipulator' here:


we love him though.