A random look at the life and times of Jim Rising recovering radio addict and newspaper columnist.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Flea Market Mania

Another flea market weekend.
It’s clear that the weather is getting to Northeast Pa.
Tempers are short, human kindness is disappearing and body odor is on the increase.
Yesterday as we swam thru the humidity I witnessed the following.
A fight broke out over a corkscrew. Or maybe it was a screwdriver. We aren’t sure. But a kid picked it up off the table at the flea market and (allegedly) tried to walk off with it. The table owner told him to return it, Dad stepped in and the end result was punches were thrown, shoves were shoved, ice packs on injured appendages, and the local Police squad had the donut run interrupted.
A woman’s sigh-Half my day is almost over she said.
A sign on a table next to a fan that read “every on tables is just 1 dollar (except fan).”
A man trying to put the moves on a table seller who wasn’t buying. Asked her if she knew who Hulk Hogan was because he was. Asked her for her phone number. No Sale.
A giant man with a considerable amount of stomach hanging out of his shirt, over his belt and producing a truly stupendous amount of body odor. I mean a stench that was causing flies to drop dead in his wake.
The award for most sack on a resold item? A local radio stations coloring book that they hand out for free being offered at .25 cents a pop.
And that noise you hear behind me. That’s my goofy neighbor. He now runs his chain saw 12 hours a day. I sure hope my other neighbors don’t do what I think about. I am not sure a chain saw enema is a good solution. But if it get’s any hotter and he keeps it up…

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